


This isn't where I thought I'd be (but I'm so glad I'm here with you)

by mideltone_one



Category: Emmerdale
Genre: Jacosh, M/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-08-16
Updated: 2017-12-30
Packaged: 2018-12-16 06:08:42
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 10,837
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11822796
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mideltone_one/pseuds/mideltone_one
Summary: Josh leaves jail, and Tracy and David take him in. He builds a completely new life from there, ably assisted by Jacob.





	1. New Beginnings

**Author's Note:**

> Emmerdale deserves at least one happy gay couple, and since they won't provide one, I decided I should.
> 
> Josh reminds me of Aaron, so I've given him Jacob as his Robert (although the parallels end there.)
> 
> Part one is scene setting, and is canon compliant as at the time of publishing. Later chapters will justify the category.
> 
> I've paid as much attention to researching the probation service as Emmerdale have to some of their stories, so apologies for any mistakes. 
> 
> This is the first multi-chapter work I've written. Not sure how long it'll take to post each chapter, or how many there'll be.

He wasn't there when the prison door opened. He wasn't there when the lad with a tag on his ankle walked out. He wasn't there when that lad found a fist and a bag of belongings thrown on the street at his home.  
  
He was there at the sentencing. Despite the protests from his dad and auntie Leyla, he'd insisted on being present. Josh had looked up at him, just before the judge had announced her decision. Jacob had watched him plead guilty, head bowed in remorse, looking more like a lost child than any criminal, had been haunted by the pitiful “sorry” he'd mouthed to his friend as he'd been led to the cells; as if he was the one who needed to apologise. They'd lost touch then, Josh moved who knew where to complete his two years sentence.

~~~

  
David looks up from the newspaper he's been reading and almost does a double take. Josh is standing in front of him, bold as brass. “Get out of my shop,” he says, loud and clear.  
The boy, who didn't look confident in the first place, shrinks into himself even more. “I just … I just want to talk to Jacob,” he says softly, “apologise and that.”  
He sounds like a scared child, making David soften his voice without thinking about it. “He's not here,” he replies, “come back another time, or if he really was a friend to you, don't bother, just leave him alone.”  
Josh sniffs, then replies, “I need to apologise. I won't get another chance.”  
  
“Why not?” Tracy’s voice makes them both jump. “Why won't you get another chance?” she asks, walking in from the back of the shop.  
“I'll be back inside tomorrow,” says Josh, his voice teetering on the edge of crying.  
“Planning to commit another offence, are you?” asks David.  
“No,” says Josh, suddenly finding some strength, “I'm not that stupid.”  
“Why then?” Tracy stares at him waiting for an answer.  
He can't make eye contact, looking down at the floor as he replies, “I'm out on licence, tagged and that, but … but …” He's having trouble saying whatever it is he needs to say. “But me mum chucked me out, so without an ‘ome I'm gonna be back inside to finish me sentence, ain't I.” A tear rolls down his face, followed by another, and within seconds he's just a heap on the floor of the shop, sobbing his heart out.  
  
Tracy rushes over and helps him up. “Come on,” she says, “lets get you out back, somewhere we can talk in private.” Looping her arm round his waist to support him and the rucksack on his back, she notices him wince. David opens his mouth to protest, but before a word comes out he gets one of her “this isn't up for discussion” looks; he knows better than to argue when she's like this. He watches the two of them make their way to the back of the shop before he goes back to his paper. Tracy will call him if she needs him and all he needs to do is make sure Jacob stays away until Josh has gone.

~~~

  
Tracy sits him down and pulls out a paper hanky from her sleeve, giving it to him to wipe his eyes. “Thanks,” he mumbles, swallowing back more tears.  
“Show me,” she says, softly but firmly. If he were stronger he'd tell her to do one, but the fight’s been knocked out of him, so he complies. Lifting his t-shirt he reveals a pattern of bruises, ranging from dull yellow to purple. One in particular stands out, clearly new. “Did you tell anyone in the prison about these?” she asks. He shakes his head, not wanting to speak in case the tears start again. “Was the latest one a parting gift?” she asks.  
He lowers his t-shirt and swallows hard. “That were me mum, to get me out the ‘ouse,” he says, “said I was a disgrace for takin’ the blame when some other sap could’ve been framed for it. I said I couldn't do that to Jacob and she ‘it me. All I've got is this bag and me bike. If I’m not home tonight, before me curfew at seven, they’ll put me back inside. I can’t go inside again. It’d kill me.”  
Tracy looks at him for a moment, before speaking very quietly. “The other prisoners … did they …” She swallows and starts again. “You don’t have to tell me, you can just nod if it’s easier … did they attack you … sexually?”  
Josh’s eyes widen for a moment and he looks shocked. There’s silence for a few seconds before he speaks, “No. No, they didn’t. They ‘ated gays, they’d never’ve done that.”  
“OK,” says Tracy, relief washing across her face.  
“I wanted to say goodbye to Jakey,” says Josh, “you know, in case sommat ‘appens.”  
Tracy shakes her head. “Nothing is going to happen.” She turns towards the front of the shop and calls out, “David, get me dad here soon as, to mind the shop. Josh needs our help.” She doesn’t hear his mumbled complaints about getting involved with a thug.

~~~

  
The waiting room for the probation officer is small and stuffy, and David would rather be anywhere else than stuck here. He’s still not entirely certain he understands why they’re involved in the arrangements for Josh’s living conditions, but when he tried to raise it with Tracy she cut him off almost immediately, saying the boy needed their help. Pointing out he’s the reason Jacob had to spend hours in a police station and nearly became a runaway hasn’t help. It’s one of the things he loves and hates about his wife; once she’s got an idea stuck in her head, nothing, absolutely nothing, will budge it.  
“Mr and Mrs Metcalfe?” They look up at the man in smart trousers and a jumper, who’s standing at the door. “Would you come with me?” They follow him to a small office where they all sit down. “I’m Martin, Josh’s parole officer,” he says, sticking out his hand.  
David takes and shakes it, “I’m David, and this is Tracy.” She smiles at Martin for a moment before speaking.  
“Where’s Josh?”  
“He’s with my colleague.”  
“Is he alright?”  
“Yes.”  
“Well, he wasn’t on the way here. Poor boy was terrified. You know he’s homeless, don’t you?”  
  
Martin nods. “Yes, it was the first thing he told me.”  
“So is he right?” asks Tracy, “If he doesn’t have a home, he’ll be back inside?”  
“Under the circumstances,” says Martin, “and to be honest I don’t understand why his mother didn’t raise this before he was released, he’ll probably be put in a hostel, or failing that a police cell. But if there’s no permanent address for him to stay at then yes, he’ll likely be recalled for the next four months.”  
“She did it to spite him, to force him back inside for the full year. It’s not a problem, he can move in with us” says Tracy, adding, before David can react, “He just needs a stable home life to get him back on track.”  
“What about Jakey?” asks David.  
“Ring him and ask him,” she replies, “You know as well as I do he won’t mind.”

~~~

  
Josh’s bloodshot eyes make it clear he's been crying again as they walk into the room. Tracy looks concerned, David slightly annoyed, and Martin professionally blank, so he has no idea what way things have gone. Martin speaks first. “Josh, I've got good news and bad news. The good news is that Mr and Mrs Metcalfe have agreed to take you in, so HDC may be transferred to their address.”  
Josh lets out the breath he hasn't realised he was holding, his whole body sagging as the tension slips away. “Thank you, thank you, thank you,” he says, looking up at the couple. After a couple of seconds he freezes. “What … um … what's the bad news?”  
Martin sighs. “There'll have to be an assessment of the new address, and until that happens, you’ll be recalled to prison.“  
Any joy Josh has been showing vanishes instantly. Looking at him David is reminded of films where the prisoner is told he's going to be executed. “I don't feel good,” says Josh, beads of sweat appearing on his forehead, “I think I’m gonna be sick.”  
“It's alright love,” says Tracy, sitting down beside him, “try breathing deeply.”  
Martin’s phone rings. “I need to take this,” he says, “I'll be back in a minute.”  
  
By the time he gets back, Josh is calmer, though still clearly worried. “I have some better news,” he says, sitting in the chair next to David, across from Josh and Tracy, “there's been a cancellation and I've explained the circumstances, so we can fast track the assessment. It should only take a couple of days.” Josh still looks doubtful, until Martin adds, “and the police station has agreed to let you stay there overnight until the assessment’s complete. You'll have to be there from seven till seven each day, and they won't be feeding you, so it’s not ideal, but it's better than prison.”  
“It's brilliant is what it is,” says Josh, “Thank you.”  
“That's OK,” replies Martin, “I was owed a favour. It wasn't anything big.”  
“Is to me,” says Josh, “you've just saved my life.”

~~~

  
When they get back to the shop, Jacob is waiting for them. “I'm guessing it went well,” says Frank, from behind the counter, “judging from the smile on Josh’s face.”  
“Been on there all the way home,” says David. He glances over at Jacob who looks concerned, “Have you changed your mind?” he asks.  
Jacob shakes his head. “No, course not, but I do need to talk to Josh, if that's OK.” He looks over at the boy.  
“Yeah, course.”  
“Go in the back then,” says Tracy, “and me and ya dad’ll start sorting stuff out at home. Dad, are you alright here for another half hour?”  
“Naturally,” says Frank, “what else is an international raconteur going to do in a village like this?”  
“When I find one to ask, I'll let you know,” she says as she walks out with David.  
“Touché,” mutters Frank, under his breath, touché.”

~~~

  
Jacob seems very nervous as he leads Josh to the back room, which makes Josh nervous himself. Perhaps he's realised having the friend that lead you astray living with you isn't such a good idea. Josh wouldn't blame him. As soon as the door shuts behind them, Jacob starts speaking. “After what I did, well I guess you won't want anything to do with me.”  
“Don't be daft.”  
“But I grassed you up. I got you sent to prison.”  
“I stole the gun. I showed the gun. I fired the gun. I got me sent to prison.”  
“But if I’d gone to Birmingham with you, we could’ve stayed with your mate. You’d’ve been free.”  
Josh shakes his head, “And spend the rest of me life lookin’ over me shoulder? Nah, you did me a favour.”  
“Really?” Jacob can't believe what he's hearing.  
“Yeah. I mean I ‘ated it in there, but it kicked me up the arse. All that ‘I’m a big man cos I went to prison’ stuff. I believed it till I were in there. Now I know it's for idiots. I understand now. I’m gonna get me life back on track. And I've got you to thank for that. Thank you, Jacob, for makin’ me sort me life out.”  
He puts his hand out and waits. Tentatively, Jacob takes the hand and is pulled into a hug. When they separate, they're both smiling. “I've missed having you around,” he says.  
“I ‘ope so cos you're gonna be seeing a lot more of me.”  
  
As they walk back into the shop, Frank looks over and sees the smiles on their faces. “All good?” he asks. He doesn't need their replies to confirm it, it's as clear as day.

~~~

  
Staying at the police station is better than being back in prison. Josh keeps telling himself this as the days drag on. Literally half of his day is spent in a cell. Whilst he could wander about, as his curfew covers the whole of the building, he's well aware that he's only staying based on the good will of the people who work here. He doesn't want to risk pushing his luck. Fortunately, the other half of each day is much better. David and Tracy have lent him some money to tide him over until he moves in with them, but he’s trying not to spend more than he has to. He gets breakfast, a buttie and a brew, at a cheap cafe near the cop shop each day, before heading into Hotton Six Form College, where he's signed up to re-do the year he missed at school. He appreciates the value of an education more now, having seen what the lack of one can do to a person. He's also decided to study business and economics, which should help him when he's a producer. As an added benefit the studying keeps him occupied in the evenings. Some of the police officers have started calling him “the professor“ as his head is in a book so often. He doesn't mind; it beats them calling him scum.  
  
It takes a week for the assessment to complete, which despite Martin ensuring him is very quick, feels like a lifetime. Tracy brings the van over to collect him and they make their way over to the village. Josh stays quiet all the way, so Tracy pulls up just outside the village. “OK, mister,” she says cheerily, “what’s up? Have you changed your mind about moving in with us?”  
“Me? No!” he says, “But I know David weren't sure, and I don't wanna cause problems, so if you've changed yer mind, I'll understand.”  
Tracy shakes her head. “Did they hit you with the daft stick or sommit back there?” she asks, “D’you think David or me could sleep at night knowing you were back in prison? Or Jakey for that matter?”  
“I guess not,” he says, “but you will tell me if I'm too much trouble, won't you? I don't wanna fu- … mess things up.”  
“Good save Josh,” she says with a smile, “but don't worry, we’ll let you know if you do anything wrong. In fact, David’s got a whole list of house rules. He’ll go through them when we get in.” She glances over at him, sees the concern on his face. “Don’t worry,” she says, “they’re nothing too bad. Just stuff like telling us where you’re going and being home when we’ve agreed.”  
“Won’t be a problem for a while,” he says, lifting his foot to reveal the ankle tag.  
“I know love,” she says with a grin, “but that’ll be off before you know it.” She starts the engine again and pulls back onto the road. “Anyway,” she adds, “your new life starts right now. Let's get you home and unpacked.”


	2. An End and a Beginning

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Some weeks have passed since Josh was released and moved in with Tracy, David, and Josh. Things aren’t going quite like Josh had planned, but nobody sees what happens next coming.

Josh lets the door swing shut behind him as he makes his way to the bike racks outside the college. To casual observers this looks like any other day. He's been attending this place for the last six weeks, always leaving at the same time. Those observers don't need to know he worries that if he stays any later he might miss his curfew and get put back inside. As he unlocks his bike some of the other students in his classes walk past, totally blanking him as usual. It's been this way since his tag was revealed. He wishes he hadn't idly lifted his trouser leg to scratch his shin during a lecture. He could almost see the recognition travel round the class like a ripple on a pond. Nobody asked him about it directly, but suddenly there was an exclusion zone around him. Vacuous “how are you?”s morphed into whispered “get lost, nutter”s. with conversations grinding to a halt as soon as he walked into a room.

It has been hard, being isolated like that, but he has told himself he is there to learn, not to socialise and has concentrated on his studies. But somehow the enthusiasm he had at the start of the courses has faded away, assisted by his inability to keep up with the rest of the students, and the word “thicko” has been added to the other insults. Earlier today he was called in to his tutor’s office and told that there have been complaints about him from other students, though he doesn’t know who would have snitched on him. It has been suggested that, given this and his failing grades, that he might be better off at another college, taking a simpler set of courses. Tracy and David have told him to talk to them if he has any problems, but he feels too ashamed by this to do it. As he cycles away from the college, he wonders what he should do now. He’s got a week to consider his plans, it being half-term, but he has a feeling it will just weigh on him more and more as the days pass.

~~~

The house is empty when he gets back. Up in his room, the pile of books perched on his desk seem to be mocking him. He doesn’t need that reminder of his situation right now, and joining the rest of his new “family” in the shop will lead to endless questions a soon as they see how troubled he is. He decides to go for a long walk, away from the rest of the villagers to collect his thoughts, to see if he can work out for himself what he should do. To avoid being seen by David, Tracy, or Jacob, he turns left out of the house and walks down towards the church. Religion has never featured too strongly in his life so he sees no point in looking for a solution in the church itself. Instead, he walks round the back of the row of cottages and emerges at the side of the cafe onto Main Street.

He’s standing looking at the cafe door, counting the the money from his pocket to see if he can afford a cup of tea, when a voice from behind him makes his blood run cold. “Oi, Crowther! Time we settled some scores.” It's Jamie and his gang, and Josh knows he needs to get away as quickly as possible. He makes a dart for the car park behind the cafe, but some of the other boys are already there, cutting off his escape. Every exit seems to be blocked and he ends up back in the graveyard. Why did he have to come back here, he wonders, the place that landed him in jail in the first place? He stops, realising he can't run for ever.  
“Get lost, Jamie,” he shouts as his pursuers arrive. He doesn't have the strength to fight right now.  
“Yer mum said she had to chuck you out, an embarrassment to the family. Not surprised, seeing as you're all tucked up with Gaycob and his family. Turned you off girls yet has he? Only a matter of time before you'll be wearing dresses and makeup.”  
“I mean it Jamie, leave me alone. You're not me mate anymore, so do one.”  
“Ooh, supposed to be scared am I?” Jamie steps closer and prods Josh in the chest. “Y’know ‘til just now, I'd’ve guessed you'd be the one givin’ it to little Gaycob, but now … d’you like it when he's inside you? You two little queers tucked up in bed? Does his dad join you at night, make the two of you his little bitches?”  
“Jamie, shut up or I swear I’ll -”  
“Do what? One word from me and you’ll be back in prison. You'll probably enjoy it being with all those men.” Jamie swings a punch which Josh tries to avoid, but it cuts his lip and before he knows what's happening he's hit in the stomach, doubling over in pain. “Not gonna fight back? Typical pansy” shouts Jamie, “Good kickin’s what you're gonna get.”  
Josh straightens up and gets another punch to the face. This time he staggers backwards before falling over. The last thing he remembers is his head hitting a gravestone, and the thought “bloody gravestones.”

As soon as they realise Josh is unconscious, the boys start to panic. The sight and sound of Harriet charging towards them shouting for them to stay where they are has them running to their bikes and then out of the village. Harriet gets to Josh and checks if he's still breathing, which he is. She curses under her breath as she realises she doesn't have her mobile with her. Looking around, she sees Robert Sugden stood over by his father's grave, phone pointing in her direction. “Robert,” she screams, “what the hell are you doing? Call an ambulance.” She pauses before adding, “And the police.”  
“Sorry,” says Robert, clearly shaken by what he's just seen.

~~~

Robert barrels into the shop, almost knocking over the display of tins David has spent an hour creating. “Whoa, whoa, where’s the fire?” he asks from behind the counter.  
It takes a few seconds for Robert to get his breath back. “Josh,” he manages at last.  
“What’s he done now?”  
“Hurt.”  
Tracy appears from the back of the shop. “Who’s hurt?” she asks.  
“Josh has hurt someone, I think,” says David.  
Robert shakes his head. “No, no. Josh has been hurt. Some kid punched him, in the graveyard. He hid a gravestone on the way down. He's unconscious.”  
“And you left him?” asks Tracy in disbelief.  
“No,” says Robert, slightly annoyed, “Harriet’s with him. We called for an ambulance, and I'm here to let you know.”  
“Sorry Robert” says David, “She gets a bit worked up about young Josh.”  
Tracy dashes to the back of the shop, reappearing seconds later with her coat. “I’ll go in with him,” she tells David, “you let Jakey know and get to the hospital as soon as you can.”

“Why would they attack him now?” asks Tracy as she and Robert race back to the graveyard.  
“I don't know,” replies Robert, “but I got some of it on my phone, if you wanted to press charges.”  
“Too bloody right I do,” she replies.

~~~

The beep has become so familiar Jacob barely even hears it now. Three days have passed, most of which he has spent in this awful room, watching Josh’s chest rise and fall at the rate set by a machine on the other side of the bed. Everyone else has tried to get him to go home, even driven him back to the village, but he’s just got on his bike and cycled back. He doesn’t want Josh to be on his own when he wakes up, and he won’t hear talk of his friend possibly not waking up. The doctor has told him Josh is in a controlled coma, and that they’ll do some tests tomorrow and see about waking him up if the results look promising. Tracy and his dad have driven back to the village, so it’s just him by the bedside. He wishes he had his lucky coin again, even wonders for a moment if he's responsible for Josh being here, if he could have prevented it somehow. Rubbish, of course, he tells himself; the world doesn't revolve around him, he knows, but it would be nice to have something to comfort him.

Josh’s arm moves and for a moment Jacob thinks he's waking up. After a few seconds of waiting he realises that isn't happening. From the looks of it, the nurse who last checked him moved his hand onto his stomach and forgot to put it back by the side of him again, so it is now slowly slipping down onto the bed. He doesn’t really know why he does it, perhaps he read somewhere about using touch to reassure people in comas, but before he knows it he is holding onto Josh’s hand, stroking the back of it with his thumb, having moved the arm back onto the bed where it should be. He starts talking about what they’ll do once Josh is back to normal. “Or as normal as you ever get,” he adds with a chuckle. He must know it will look odd, because as soon as the door starts to open behind him he lets go and jerks his hand back to his own lap.  
“Everything OK, Jacob?” asks the nurse. He's been here so much they treat him like a friend.  
“Yeah” he replies, “His hand was slipping off him, so I moved it back.”  
“He'll be pleased somebody's looking out for him,” she replies with a smile before checking Josh’s health and writing down the results in the folder at the end of the bed.

Against the coolness of the room, Josh's hand feels comfortingly warm, as he takes hold of it again following the departure of the nurse. So comforting that he contorts himself so he can read the latest details written by the nurse without having to let go. He yawns as he puts the folder beck where it came from. All the worry is wearing him out and he starts to feel drowsy. He should let go of his friend's hand and settle back in his chair, but he can’t. His mind wanders as his eyes close, imaging Josh holding him, warm breath on the back of his neck, their lips touching … He jerks his head up straight again, trying to work out why he's thinking of Josh this way. It makes no sense; he's not gay, why would he think about Josh holding him tight, rocking back and forth to some song like an old married couple? He shakes his head again. Tiredness must be overtaking his reasoning. He gently lays Josh's hand back on the bed, although it feels odd and uncomfortable. Then he picks up his phone and calls David. “Dad, can you come and get me? I really, really need some sleep.”

~~~

A night away hasn’t really helped that much. Jacob has slept better, being in a bed instead of doubled up on a chair, but he has dreamt about Josh, most memorably the two of them facing one another sitting in a field, staring into each other’s eyes as Josh takes his hands and tells him he loves him. The really worrying thing, for Jacob, is that none of these dreams have upset him. If anything, he feels a warm glow in the pit of his stomach when he thinks about Josh, which can’t be right. Even if he is gay, or bisexual, the only boy he’s got these feelings for is Josh, and there’s no way he will reciprocate. Better to bury them, and pretend his heart doesn’t race a little every time he thinks of his friend.

Tracy’s phone rings while they're having breakfast. She takes it out of the room so Jacob doesn't know what it's about until she comes back in. “They're planning to wake Josh up this afternoon,” she says, “said we should be there. David, can you get me dad to cover for me? I assume you'll want to be there with me when he comes round.” She looks at Jacob and he nods in reply. Perhaps he should keep his distance, try to reduce the ache in his chest which he's feeling right now, but wouldn't that look suspicious? Best just carry on as normal.

“You'll let me know as soon as you find out anything, won't you?” asks David, sounding oddly concerned. Jacob imagines his friend would be surprised at just how much his dad has started caring about him. Would he still care if he found out his boys were in love? He shakes his head. Where did that come from?

~~~

They have to wait outside while the doctors and nurses monitor Josh’s progress out of the coma, which gives Jacob some time to plan his strategy. He doubts Josh will remember the hand holding, so he'll just have to convince himself that he doesn't miss the contact once he's in there. He stands in the corridor chanting “I don't fancy him” in his head and twisting his knuckle in his palm, which Tracy mistakes for angst. He jumps when she lays her hand on his shoulder and tells him everything will be fine.  
“I know,” he says, because confronting the truth is just too hard.

The doctor wasn't wrong when she said Josh would be a bit groggy at first. He keeps drifting in and out of consciousness, and the first two times he wakes up he greets Jacob as if he's just arrived. This is, apparently, normal and nothing to worry about. In any case, Jacob has to concentrate on not taking hold of Josh's hand every time he falls asleep. The third time he wakes up he seems to remember why he's here, although his memories of what happened are a bit patchy.

Tracy excuses herself in order to ring David, leaving Jacob on his own in the room with Josh. It's strange being here with his friend talking to him after the hours of silence. “‘Ere, mate,” says Josh, still sounding slightly drunk, “When they examined me, I saw I’ve got this wicked bruise.” He unties his gown, which sets Jacob's heart racing, and opens it slightly to show a large bruise on the side of his stomach, which is starting to turn yellow at the edges. “That looks really bad,” says Jacob, trying not to stare, “does it hurt?”  
“Only when I press it.”  
“Well don't press it then, you idiot,” says Jacob with a grin.  
“Yeah, I'd worked that out meself,” replies Josh, “but it's not all bad.”  
“Oh?”  
“Yeah, some of these young nurses are well fit. Reckon I could be in there, if I play it right.”

The words hit Jacob like an ice cold dagger in his heart. Of course Josh is after a nurse, why wouldn't he be? All Jacob's fantasies are just that; worthless dreams that must now be consigned to the bin. He doesn't know how he makes it through the next hour, but for once he's happy to leave the hospital behind him. Sitting in the car on the way back to the village, he stares out of the window and tries to work out how he’s going to manage living with Josh without his secret feelings coming out.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Emmerdale is the property of ITV Studios


	3. Two Paths

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Josh comes home, and he and Jacob grow closer

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Apologies for the long gap - real life got in the way. Hopefully the next update will be quicker.

Josh has been home all of three hours and Tracy's fussing is already starting to irritate him. He knows she means well, but checking he's still breathing every few minutes while he's trying to sleep is just annoying. He's trying to work out how to tell her when he hears Jacob talking to her on the other side of the bedroom door. "He'll be fine. They wouldn't have let him out if they'd been worried." Tracy says something that Josh can't hear followed by Jacob saying "I'll check in on him in an hour, just to set your mind at rest. Now go and sit down, you look shattered."

He hears the stairs creaking, and moments later there's a knock on the door. "Yeah?" he says softly.  
The door swings open and Jacob's head appears around it. "You OK, mate?" he asks.  
"Yeah, just knackered really."  
"I'll let you get your head down then," says Josh.  
"Thanks mate. And thanks for getting Tracy to calm down."  
"You heard that?" asks Jacob. Josh nods, instantly regretting it. "It's only because she cares," Jacob adds.  
"I know," replies Josh. In truth, he's finding it very strange. The last time he was discharged from hospital he was basically left to fend for himself. His mother went on a bender, so he had to cope alone. Being cared for, other than by medical staff who are paid to do it, feels very odd.  
"Right," says Jacob, cutting across Josh's train of thought, "I'll check back in an hour, make sure you haven't died or owt."  
"Oh cheers mate," replies Josh, smiling for the first time since he got back. He watches Jacob's grin disappear and the door close and before long he's fast asleep.

He wakes with a start, in the middle of a dream where he and Jacob are hiding from someone or something, pressed up against one another in a cupboard. He's confused at just how comfortable he feels in the dream, being so physically close to his friend. It's Jacob's voice he hears as he turns over in bed. "Josh? It's time for your next lot of painkillers." He takes a moment to properly come to, rubbing his eyes to clear them, before he sits up a bit and takes the tablets and glass of water his friend is holding out to him. "Need anything?" asks Jacob as he takes back the glass.  
"How long have I been asleep?"  
"Two hours, give or take. You look like you could do with some more, so I'll leave you to it. I'll check back in an hour."  
"Thanks," says Josh as he shuffles back down the bed.

He's back in the dream almost immediately. Jacob has started coughing, so to stop him and protect them both, Josh puts his hand over his friend's mouth. The warm breath on his fingers makes him feel odd, and he quickly realises that he's getting aroused. Even more worryingly, Jacob can obviously feel this erection pressed against him, but all he does is smile, then kiss the hand over his mouth. He wakes with a start again and rolls onto his back, horrified to realise that he's aroused in real life. Unable to believe it, he stares at the lump in his jeans. It's as if he is demanding an explanation from his body, which, of course, he doesn't get. Hearing footsteps on the stairs he panics and rolls back onto his stomach, closing his eyes and trying to slow his breathing so it will look like he's asleep. As he waits for the door to open, he wracks his brain trying to work out why he's feeling like this. He can't think of any reason he'd fancy his friend; it's not like his gay or anything.

The bedroom door opens and he waits with baited breath for it to close again. Once the door is shut, he tries to distract himself, imagining he's with one of the nurses from the hospital. He pictures himself on top of her, both of them naked; it's not like he hasn't thought about this before, with lots of women, but within seconds it is Jacob who appears beneath him and he can't help himself leaning down and kissing his friend.

He opens his eyes in shock, his heart racing. Why does he keep thinking of Jacob with him in compromising positions? He wonders if this is all a side effect of the medicines he's taking. Perhaps he should go cold turkey, see if that fixes it. Another pang of pain tells him that's not a realistic option. He looks over at the bedside cabinet and realises he's out of painkillers. He could use his phone to get someone to come up, but the thought of spending all day stuck in this room when he's only just left one in the hospital, encourages him to get up. He feels a bit dizzy as he stands, and before he knows it he's tripping over his own feet and slamming into the wall. There's a rough patch of plaster, which he guesses has never been a priority to fix in the box room, which he catches the back of his hand on, grazing the skin. He swears loudly, then seconds later hears someone racing up the stairs and opening the door.

Jacob is surprised to see him up, then horrified at the blood dripping from his hand. "What have you done?" he asks, taking hold of his friend's hand. Josh goes to pull it away but is stopped. "Don't be stupid," says Jacob, "we need to clean this up. Last thing you need is an infected cut." He fishes a handkerchief out of his pocket and wraps it around Josh's hand. "Hold that," he says, "while I get the first aid kit."  
"I'm not an invalid" protests Josh, "I can get to the kitchen on me own."  
"OK then, but let me go down the stairs in front of you, just in case." Josh doesn't have the energy to argue.

~~~

Josh could fix his hand himself of course, he knows. It's hardly open heart surgery, putting some disinfectant on some grazes, and wrapping a bandage around them. But it's so much better when Jacob is doing it, and in particular, holding his hand. He can't be certain, but it feels like Jacob is moving more slowly than usual. Every time he winces, as Jacob dabs with the antiseptic, the grip tightens for a moment, and there's a concerned glance towards him, until he lets go of the breath he's holding. And while he doesn't fully understand what it is between the two of them, he knows it's more than friendship; on his side at least. Not, he guesses, that it matters as Jacob isn't into boys

Jacob, for his part, hates that he's hurting his friend, but the opportunity to hold Josh's hand again is not something he's willing to give up. There's something about the way Josh responds when they make eye contact that sets his heart racing, but he knows nothing will come of it. It would be easier to cope with his feelings if there were someone else to transfer them to, but there isn't. He doesn't find other lads attractive, and girls aren't turning his head either. The image in his head is of the hand he is holding wrapped around his waist as he and Josh watch a film snuggled up together on the sofa.

From the looks passing between them, Jacob feels there is some sort of connection, but he's too scared to act on it. If he's wrong, if he's misreading the signals, he could lose his friend, and if Tracy and his dad notice the tension between them, they'll ask Josh to leave which will mean prison. He can't do that to his friend.

~~~

The next couple of days see the boys trying not to spend too much time alone together, without making it obvious to each other or anybody else that that's what they're doing. Josh is worried his secret is out when Tracy and David call him down for a talk at the end of the week.

Tracy directs him to the empty chair opposite her and David at the kitchen table. "I rang up the college," she says, "to tell them you weren't up to coming in because of the, um, accident." He swallows hard, knowing what's probably coming next. "So they seemed surprised that you'd be coming back at all, told me they were expecting you to leave, that your grades weren't good enough, that there had been complaints."

He blushes, embarrassed by the mess he's made of everything. "Why didn't you tell us what was going on?" asks David, his voice low and calm, "Did I not make it clear when you moved in here that you could tell us anything, that we'd do whatever we could to help you?"  
"Wouldn't've made any difference" he says at last, "Problem is I were just too stupid to keep up. No surprise to anyone, least of all me."  
"Oh no you don't," replies David, "this isn't some sort of pity party. You don't get off the hook like that. If you were finding it hard going, why didn't you tell us?"  
"I were embarrassed," he says quietly, looking down at the table where his hands are clasped, "I worked so 'ard, but it just wouldn't go in." He taps his head, wincing at the self inflicted pain. "Turns out I ain't as clever as I thought. They said I were a thicko. Looks like they were right."

"That's not true" says Tracy, "You've been through a lot, had a lot of pressure. Nobody'd do well."  
"Anyone can shine when everything's good" says David, "It's what you do when things turn bad that matters. You just need to think through your options."  
Josh sighs. "I were tryin' to do that when I got ambushed by Jamie."  
"Look love," says Tracy, sounding like a concerned mother which freaks Josh out a bit, "we just want you to be happy. If studying full time doesn't work for you, sommit else will. You just have to find it."  
"But we're not having you mope around here all day," says David, in a slightly firmer tone than usual, "so you can help out in the shop for your board and lodgings while you work out what to do next." Josh nods. It isn't ideal, but beggars can't be choosers.

~~~

It's Monday, and Jacob is enjoying his last day of freedom, an inset day, before school starts again. David has let him off working in the shop, and Tracy has persuaded her husband to let Josh have a day off too, to keep Jacob company. Unsure of each other's feelings, but not wanting to raise suspicions, they've decided to spend the morning playing video games.

After a particularly unsuccessful mission, which ended with Josh accidentally blowing the two of them sky high, he tries to spin it as a deliberate move. "It were tactical" he tells Jacob as they leave the room, "You only died cos you were in the wrong place."  
"Oh yeah," says Jacob, shaking his head, "not you being a bloody idiot." As he pushes ahead of Josh he knocks him against the wall, accidentally hitting his head.  
There's barely any contact, though Josh decides to trick his friend to get the upper hand again. "Ow," he cries, grabbing his head, "That really hurts ... I don't feel so good." He slumps against the wall and slides down it, pretending to be unconscious.  
Jacob's demeanour changes immediately. "Are you alright?" he asks, panic in his voice, "Josh? Wake up Josh. Josh? Oh God, what have I done? Ambulance, need to get an ambulance."  
As he pulls his phone out of his pocket, Josh opens his eyes. "Gotcha!" he laughs.  
Jacob doesn't see the joke at all. "That's not funny," he says, barely containing his anger.  
"It is a bit mate," says Josh, grinning at his friend.  
Jacob is shaking now. "Get lost," he shouts, getting up and running out of the room.  
Josh jumps up and runs after him, shouting his name as he goes.

Unloading his van outside the shop, David is surprised to see Jacob rush out of the house, clearly upset, pursued by Josh.  
"Josh" he shouts, "What's happened?"  
Josh is torn. He'd like to follow Jacob, try to make peace, but he feels he owes David an explanation, since the man is being good enough to house him. Perhaps the wisest move is to let Jacob calm down a little before he talks to him. "I dunno" he says, rushing over to the van, "We were 'avin' a laugh and then ..."  
David knows his son, knows he's not being told the whole truth. "And then ... what did you do Josh?"  
Looking down at the floor, Josh sighs before responding, "Nothin' much."  
"Nothin', exactly what?"  
"'E pushed me against the wall, accidentally like, so I pretended to be knocked out."  
"Oh God, why did you do that?"  
"It were funny."  
"Yeah, I can see how much it amused him. He always runs off like that when he's happy."  
"I didn't know 'e were gonna flip out like that?"  
"After what he went through when you were in hospital?"  
"Didn't know he went through anything. I were unconscious, weren't I."

David nods. "Yeah, OK. I thought Tracy or Jakey might have told you."  
"Nope."  
"Well that would explain it." Josh stares at him, waiting. David steps towards him and lowers his voice. "When they didn't know if you'd wake up again ... it nearly broke him. I mean, you know how worried he can get, right?" Josh nods; he's seen it for himself, but only ever about David getting sick again with cancer. "Well we couldn't get him to come home. He slept in the chair in your room. He looked so rough we thought we'd be visiting the both of you."  
"Looked OK, when I woke up."  
"Yeah. We managed to get him home eventually. He still came back every day, until they said you'd be alright."

Josh raises his eyebrows. "I didn't know," he says, before looking over at where Jacob was heading. "Guess I should go after 'im."  
"Yeah," says David, "just be careful with him, right."  
Josh nods, "Yeah, OK."

It has to be in the graveyard that he finally finds Jacob. Every time he's here, something bad happens. He thinks he might insist on being cremated, just so there's no chance of him ending up stuck here for eternity. Jacob is standing by the gravestone that knocked him out, a face like thunder.

He barely hears Josh approach, and when he does, he just directs the ice cold stare from the gravestone to his companion. Josh suddenly feels very cold. The easiest thing to do would be to let him be, but then the wrong ideas in his head would just get stronger and stronger, until nothing Josh could say would change them. "Look like you wish it'd finished me off" he says softly, glancing at the gravestone.  
"I'm not the sort of sicko who wishes people dead," spits Jacob, "or pretends to be dying."  
"It were a joke," says Josh, full of remorse now it's clear what his actions have done to his friend, "but it were a rubbish joke."  
"Like all your jokes," replies Jacob angrily. Josh knows he doesn't mean that because they've spent hours together laughing at one another's comments, but he lets it go this time.  
"Yeah," he replies, "look, yer dad told me what ya did at 'ospital, stayin' n that."  
"I thought you were going to die," says Josh, clearly close to breaking down.  
"You ain't gettin' rid of me that easy," says Josh, in a failed attempt to lighten the mood.

He doesn't know why he does it, but instinctively he steps forward and pulls Jacob into a hug, causing the boy to almost collapse against him, tears rolling down his face. "It's alright mate," is all Josh can say, stroking the back of his friend's head to counteract the sobs wracking his body.

Calming down slightly, Jacob lifts his head, tears still dripping down his cheeks. "If I lost you," he says falteringly, "I couldn't, I just couldn't..." He doesn't know how to put his feelings into words, is past caring if they'll be accepted.  
"You ain't gonna lose me," says Josh, staring into Jacob's eyes. Without realising it, he leans in, adding "never", just before their lips meet. It's a chaste kiss, interrupted by the sound of Tracy frantically calling Josh's name. The boys jump apart, neither ready just yet to expose their relationship.  
She appears a few seconds later, relief washing over her face. "Thank God I've found you," she says, slightly out of breath.  
"What is it? What's happened?" asks Josh, immediately imagining it's David who's in trouble.  
"Your mum's been in an accident," says Tracy, "she was hit by a car."  
"Is she ..." Josh can't bring himself to ask the question in his head.  
"She's unconscious but stable at the moment" replies Tracy, "David's going out there as soon as possible. We think you should go as well, just in case."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Emmerdale is the property of ITV Studios


	4. Getting a Foothold

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jacob and Josh realise they both want the same thing, and Josh gets a new start.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Making updates more frequently still needs work. Perhaps that should be my new year's resolution.

Josh tries to keep himself busy while he waits for David, and more importantly Jacob, to return from the airport. Tracy suggested he go with her to meet them, but he hadn't been sure of the reception he'd get, so made his excuses. As it turns out the shop has been quite busy, the added bonus being he doesn't have time to worry about exactly what his relationship, if he can call it that, with Jacob is.

He's so busy tidying the shelves at the back of the shop that he doesn't notice they're back until Tracy taps him on the shoulder. He nearly jumps out of his skin, which is met by a chuckle from David. Tellingly, he thinks, there is no laughter from Jacob standing by the door; he looks something between confused and concerned.

Walking over, Jacob fist bumps him, which is at least some sort of contact, and leans in to say quietly, "We need to talk." Leaning back he looks at David, "Can you spare him for five minutes, dad?"  
David turns to Frank, a question on his face. Frank nods, "it's been busy, he's due a break."  
"Go on then, but be back in half an hour." As Josh follows Jacob into the back room, he wonders if he's going to have twenty nine minutes to regret the kiss.

They walk to the back of the room, wanting to keep away from any prying eyes, or ears. Jacob leans against the wall and stares at Josh, putting him on edge. Eventually he speaks, "Wot? Jake, wot?"  
Jacob swallows hard. "Do you regret it?"  
"Do I regret what?" He's really confused now.  
"Our kiss."  
It's said so quietly he barely hears it, but he shakes his head violently before replying. "No, of course not."  
"So why didn't you mention it? All those messages and ... nothing?"

Josh shrugs. "At first it didn't feel right, wiv yer mum and that. And then ... well you weren't sayin' nothing, so I thought you must've decided it were a mistake. No point me askin'." He lowers his gaze to the floor, worried he won't like what he sees on Jacob's face.  
It's Jacob's turn to shake his head. "If we're gonna make a go of this, we need to get better a talking to one another."  
"Make a go of what?" asks Josh.  
Jacob swallows, lowers his voice, "Being boyfriends?"

It's out there, no taking it back now. Jacob is obviously worried what the response to his suggestion will be, not that he needs to be. "Don't boyfriends get to kiss and cuddle each other when they've been apart?" asks Josh.  
Jacob's smile lights up the room as he steps up to Josh and puts his arms around him.

Their second kiss is more assured than the first. Knowing they both want this allows Josh to relax into it, one hand caressing the back of Jacob's neck as the other pulls him closer. When they break, they touch their foreheads together. "My boyfriend Jake," says Josh, liking the feel of it on his lips.  
"My boyfriend Josh," echos Jacob, adding a light kiss to the end of it.  
"Josh, need you out here buddy." It's Frank calling from the shop that has them pulling apart.  
"I think," starts Josh.  
"We need to tell dad?" asks Jacob  
"God no," replies Josh, "not unless you want me chucked out for corrupting you."  
"Is that the plan," asks Jacob, as they walk to the door.  
"Might be," says Josh with a big grin.

~~~

It's been a few days now since Jacob got back and everyone has noticed the change in Josh's mood; there's a definite spring in his step that wasn't there before, and he keeps drifting off into a world of his own when he should be working.

"What is up with him?" David asks Tracy as they lean on the counter watching him standing by a display of tins staring into space.  
"I think he's in love," says Tracy with a big grin, "and from the looks of it, he's certain she's the one."  
"He's found his Tracy has he?" asks David, putting his arms around her.  
"Ah" she replies softly, before adding, "No idea who she is though."  
"Hoping to warn her off?"  
"No! Why would you say that?"  
"Because he's hardly gonna be first on any parent's list of desirable boyfriends, is he? Moody ex-con and that."  
"He won't be moody when he's with her. Let's see if we can find out her name."

Detaching herself from David, much to his dismay, she wanders over to where Josh is standing, his mind still freewheeling. "Josh love," she says softly, "are you OK? Only you've been standing here in a world of your own for the last five minutes."  
He blushes. "Sorry," he says, "I'll get on wiv it."  
"It's not about the work," she says.  
They can both just about hear David say under his breath, "It is."  
"I'm guessing, from that grin you've had the last couple of days, that someone's caught your eye."  
"No," says Josh, drawing it out as he tries to think up a convincing lie.  
"Jacob told me," says Tracy leaning closer, "well I made him tell me, so don't blame him."

Given that David hasn't punched him, or frog marched him out of the shop to see his possessions in a heap out on the street, he guesses that Jacob hasn't told her about them. On the other hand he has no idea what Jacob has told her. "Told you what?" he asks, hoping he can prevent himself contradicting what she thinks she already knows.  
"About that girl."  
"What girl?"  
"The blonde one, in here yesterday ... Sarah?"

If Josh could blush on demand now would be the time to do it. As luck would have it he's still bright red from when the conversation started. Sarah is in the same class as Jacob for physics and whilst he recognises her, obviously there's no attraction. "Don't know what you're on about," he says, hoping it's just the right amount of denial to make Tracy think she's on the right track.  
"If you say so love," she says, walking back to David. Josh lets out a sigh of relief once she's out of earshot.

When Jacob gets back from school, Sarah is amongst the pupils with him. He looks over at Josh, then at her. It's the signal they pre-arranged when he got Josh's text telling him what Tracy had done. He'd apologised for not letting Josh know about his conversation with Tracy, getting the text "Sure we can find a way for you to make it up to me" by reply.

Josh goes over and talks to her and the others for a few minutes. It's clear she's not interested in him, or he her, but it seems to be enough to satisfy Tracy, which is the only reason he's doing it. He makes a point of taking out his phone and tapping away as if he's asked for her number, and once the shop is empty again he texts Jacob "Sarah's OK, but you're the sexiest person in the room." Behind the counter, out of earshot, Tracy turns to David and says "See, he's texting her already."

~~~

Monday's been going as well as Mondays ever can when Josh gets the letter. At first he's excited, expecting it to be about his tag being removed, which he's counting down the days to. But when he opens it he finds a letter telling him that Jamie, after a review of his sentence, is being released earlier than expected. It sends him into a spiral, thinking about how Jamie will have a go at him for being a shop boy. When David suggests he makes them both a coffee, Josh is gone for ages.

Eventually, David makes his way into the back room, where he finds Josh holding a knife and staring at the blade. "Y'alright mate?" he asks cautiously, causing Josh to drop the blade into the sink as if he never had it in his hand. It's then that David sees the letter on the worktop. He picks it up and reads it. "I know it's a shock, so early and that," he says, putting a comforting hand on Josh's shoulder, "but at least you're not going to bump into him. It says he can't come round here, as a condition of his licence. You're not considering going after him, are you? With the knife and that?"  
"You think I'm that stupid?" asks Josh angrily, suddenly imagining the reaction he and Jacob would get if they told David about their relationship.  
"I didn't think you were stupid enough to take a gun from me dad's and pull the trigger," saids David, "but you were." He regrets the words the moment they're out of his mouth.  
"Well you won't want a violent idiot like me in yer shop," says Josh, before storming out of the back room and out through the entrance of the shop, almost knocking Robert over as he walks in.

"I see the village's resident fire arms expert is off colour," says Robert as he puts a pint of milk down on the shop counter.  
"What, me dad?" asks David, walking up to the counter.  
"No, Josh," replies Robert with a grin.  
"Don't even joke about it" says David, "He found out Jamie, the lad that attacked him, is getting out soon, and then I caught him with a knife out back. I don't think he was actually going to do anything with it, it's just he hates working here, but he's not getting any job offers and it's all getting on top of him again. All he really needs is a lucky break, someone to invest some time in him."  
"I thought he was going back to studying?" asks Robert, seeing parallels with Aaron.  
"Couldn't keep up with all the courses he'd signed up to. He was so keen to get his life back on track, he thought he could do everything. Now his confidence is being chipped away at, day by day."  
"He's good with cars, isn't he?"  
"Yeah," replies David, "he fixed that hire car me dad had in under a minute apparently."  
"Maybe the garage would take him on. Have you asked Cain or Debbie?"  
"No. Not really approachable those two, are they?"  
Robert nods. "Leave it with me, I'll see what I can do."  
"Thanks," says David, "though you'd best clear it with him first or likely as not he'll just throw it back in your face."

~~~

Jacob is sitting at the bus stop when Robert sees him, clearly looking upset. "I heard about Jamie being released," says Robert, "but if you're thinking about revenge, I can tell you that's not a good idea."  
"I weren't," says Josh, starting to get up, "but everyone's certain I'm gonna want it, except me that is."  
Robert puts a hand on his shoulder to slow him down. "Ah," he says, "trying to run away from your past reputation. I've done a bit of that in my time too."  
"Look like you did it OK," says Josh, slumping down on the seat again, "but I ain't you."  
"No," says Robert, "but everyone in this village has something in their past they'd rather forget."  
"Really?"  
"Really. The trick is to find something positive, a first step on the ladder, that you can build on, and go with it. Keep your nose clean and after a while everyone'll've forgotten your past."  
"I guess, but how do I get on the ladder? Who's gonna employ me, a tagged ex-con with no qualifications?"  
"I might know someone. It'd be working with cars." He sees concern on Josh's face so adds, "Fixing them, not washing them, though knowing Cain I shouldn't promise that."  
Josh's face brightens a little. "Beats serving in the shop all day."  
"It would give you a trade, with college courses and that, while you work on, what was it Tracy said you wanted to be?"  
"Music producer."  
"There you go. It's a new start, something to get your teeth into. I can put in a word for you, see what Cain thinks, if you want."  
"I do, thanks." Robert gets up to leave, but Josh has one more question, "Why are you helping me, after what I've done?"  
Robert pauses for a moment before answering, "Because everyone deserves a second chance, and the more I do things like this the less people remember the git I used to be."

~~~

"Aaron, I need a favour."  
"Is this your good samaritan thing again?" asks Aaron.  
"Yeah," replies Robert, "and it won't even cost you a penny. It's a favour for Josh."  
"Josh? As in Josh who took a rifle to your dad's headstone? I thought you hated him."  
Robert shrugs. "I did, but then I realised what he needed was a helping hand, so I changed my mind. Anyway, none of that matters. The thing is, he feels trapped working in the shop, but he's good with motors, so I was wondering if you could ask Cain to take him on as an apprentice, tea boy, whatever. Something to get him motivated, help him learn a trade."

~~~

The "interview" is not exactly what Josh is expecting. He's been told to get to the garage by ten, but he's so worried about being late that he's hanging around on the street corner by nine forty five. After a couple of minutes of nervous waiting, Cain spots him and calls him over, "Oi mate, over 'ere."

"I've seen you fix Eric's motor, so I know you've some clue about what's under the bonnet, and Aaron said you might want to try a course like he did, a couple of days a week, to get qualifications."  
"Yeah," says Josh, "I tried studyin' all the time, just didn't work out."  
"Yeah, well there's those as reads, and those as does," says Cain. "I've nothing against it, just as long as the work gets done."  
"Sounds good to me," says Josh, smiling for the first time since he arrived.  
"Any questions?" asks Cain, having apparently made up his mind.  
Josh rocks from side to side for a moment. "You need to know I've got a police record," he says, "for letting off ..."  
"Pollard's rifle in the graveyard," interrupts Cain, "yeah I know. Took a chunk out of old man Sugden's headstone I heard."  
"Yeah," says Josh, "but I'm saving up to pay Robert back for the replacement, me and Jacob that is."  
"I were never a fan of Jack Sugden," says Cain, "so I won't hold that against you."  
"Thanks," says Josh, "but the thing is, if there's anything dodgy going on, and I ain't saying there is, but, well, I wouldn't wanna know or be involved. I can't go back inside."  
"Unusual thing to do when you're after a job," says Cain, "accusing your potential boss of being a criminal."

Josh shakes his head. "Sorry," he says, "I knew I'd screw it up, but I didn't want to lie." Without waiting for a response, he turns on his heel and walks back to the shop. David and Tracy are sitting behind the counter when he walks in.  
"Blimey, that were quick," says David, ."how'd you get on?"  
"Blew it, didn't I," replies Josh, "same as usual. Had to open me big mouth and accuse 'im of being a crook."  
The two adults exchange glances. Josh seems to be a good judge of character. "Well it's not the end of the world, is it?" says Tracy, trying to lift the boy's mood, "you'll always have a job here if you want it. And there'll be other jobs."  
"I know," says Josh, "but working so close, it just ticked so many of the boxes."

The sound of the shop door opening interrupts them, but there's a deafening silence as Cain walks in. "I hope this is just you gettin' the biscuits in," he tells Josh firmly, "cos I'm paying you to fix cars, not stand around and chat."  
"You're employing him?" David sounds as surprised as he looks, "even after what he said?"  
"He told me the truth, up front. Didn't worry what it would do to his chances. I admire that." He steps closer to Josh lowering his voice so only they can hear, "and I will keep you away from anything dodgy, OK?"  
"Thank you," says Josh, a little lost for words.  
"Go on then, get back over there. Find yourself some overalls. I'll be over in a minute."

Josh runs out of the shop, leaving Cain to pick up a packet of biscuits. He walks back to the till and puts them down. "On the house," says David before he can speak, "by way of a thank you for taking him on."  
"He's got potential," says Cain, "or I wouldn't be bothering. We're not a charity."  
"We know," says Tracy, "and we don't want special treatment, but thank you anyway."  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Emmerdale is the property of ITV Studios

**Author's Note:**

> Emmerdale is the property of ITV Studios


End file.
